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how to stop comparison


Welcome back to my blog!

 

Today's post is going to be all about comparison and how to prevent getting caught up in that cycle. I know I definitely have my days where I struggle and it's super common for other girls to get caught up in this too. I am not an expert and definitely don't have it all figured out but I used to struggle with comparison big time in college and over the past few years I have definitely discovered how to avoid falling into that thought pattern/cycle. 

 

Naturally as women we tend to compare ourselves. We compare our bodies, our relationships, our families, our homes. We compare what kind of wife, what kind of girlfriend, what kind of daughter, what kind of friend we are. Why are we always looking at other people as the "ideal version" of ourself instead of thinking that who we are is just as amazing??  I often catch myself looking at other people and think: "what are they doing that I can do better?"  This kind of thinking is NOT healthy or realistic.  


Comparison is the quickest way to suck the joy out of being who you are.

 

Comparison will always leave you feeling dissatisfied and unfulfilled. It can go both ways too. You can compare yourself to others and belittle yourself or you can compare yourself to others to make yourself feel better. The root that comparison stems from is insecurity and insecurity should not be controlling your life! The more you compare the more you are damaging your perspective of yourself. Comparison prevents you from showing up in your own life and distracts you from your blessings. 


Here are three things to think about when you catch yourself in comparison: 

 

Make sure your actions come from pure intentions.

    It's important to evaluate why you are comparing yourself. Is it because you need approval from others to feel secure or you want to be the best? If so your comparison is rooted in insecurity and it's not something you should be trying to fix by comparing your life to someone else's.  Instead of looking at your weaknesses, ask yourself what your strengths are, then celebrate them!  Be proud of them and work on using them to your best advantage. Maybe it's looking into how you can use your passion in your job. Or maybe your strength is encouraging others, so plan a coffee date with a friend who could use someone to confide in.

Focus on what really matters

Sometimes we place too much emphasis on what others think about us. I know that I do this. For example, I just got back from a family vacation in Michigan. I found myself getting so caught up in taking pictures of everything so I could share it on social media that it started to take away from the purpose of the trip: spending quality time with my loved ones. I had to reevaluate myself and remember what's important. Yes, it's fun to take pictures so you have memories but if your desire to share with others online is taking away from the people right in front of you, it's time for a reality check. 

 

Remember the big picture

It is SO easy to get caught up in the here and now but let me tell you...life is way too short to spend worrying about how you rank in comparison to others. Life is not a competition. It’s a journey. We are all on a journey, to find something, to become something, to learn, and to create. That journey has nothing to do with how well other people are doing, or what they have.



You were made to be YOU, not someone else. Being willing to show up as authentically yourself, flaws and all, can seem scary. I promise you it is so so worth it. 



 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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