Looking for some advice on how to have a happy relationship? Let’s get one thing out of the way.
Fairy tale relationships do NOT exist.
But you know what does exist? Happy relationships. Really, truly happy and healthy relationships. This does not mean every day will be amazing. This does not mean things will always be easy. And this definitely does not mean it won’t take work. It does!
Here are my top four tips on how to have a genuinely happy relationship...
COMMUNICATE
Communication keeps you on the same page and helps you stay emotionally connected. Talk to your partner about your feelings. Ask questions and genuinely listen to their answers. If you're upset, admit it. Don't make your partner try to figure out what's wrong. (This is one that I am not perfect at, but working on. ) Talking through problems builds trust and makes your relationship stronger.
Communication keeps you on the same page and helps you stay emotionally connected. Talk to your partner about your feelings. Ask questions and genuinely listen to their answers. If you're upset, admit it. Don't make your partner try to figure out what's wrong. (This is one that I am not perfect at, but working on. ) Talking through problems builds trust and makes your relationship stronger.
ASSUME THE BEST
Focus on the good in your partner even within the moments of frustration. When you assume the worst, you automatically put the other person in defense mode. In defense mode, your patience can run thin, more arguments happen, and communication is more difficult. Rather than pointing out everything your partner is doing wrong, take the time to let them know what they do that makes you happy. It will soften your heart and help you appreciate them, flaws and all. When you assume the best of your significant other they will feel that you are for them and on their side. When you have confidence that your significant other truly wants to understand you, discussions can turn into growth opportunities instead of drama. Always assume the best.
SPEND QUALITY TIME TOGETHER
It's so easy for a relationship to deteriorate into “what’s comfortable.” While being comfortable with each other is good thing, it’s definitely not ideal for the longterm health of a relationship. In order to keep learning about your partner and growing together, you need to go through experiences together. A great way to do that is to spend time with each other outside the house, in new and exciting situations. If you don’t take the time to put the other stuff away and spend focused quality time with each other, you will grow apart.
SPEND TIME APART
Couple's time is great but spending every single minute together isn't. It's important to remember that every relationship is unique and involves two people. If you aren’t happy outside of your relationship, you will not be happy inside your relationship. It's healthy to have your own friends and interests. Helping each other become better people and better partners often goes together, so it's important to focus on yourself as well. Make sure you nurture your own interests and desires, take a class you're interested in, make plans with friends, instead of waiting for your partner to fill the void!
My boyfriend Devin and I have been together 2 and 1/2 years and I can honestly say we are just as happy as we were when we first started dating. Both of us continuously do the tips mentioned above and it definitely makes a difference in our relationship. The bottom line: happy couples love each other. And loving someone isn’t just about saying it every day – it’s about showing it every day.
Comments